When was the last time you were at a cocktail party and someone cornered you with a story about how things just weren’t going well with their new business, their job search, or their family? When it happened, how did it make you feel? If you’re like most people you probably felt helpless and uncomfortable. You listened politely until you could find a way to make your exit. And when you came across their business card the next day, those uncomfortable feelings  rushed back, so you pushed the card out of sight.

Sound familiar?

Unless you’re conducting a Nigerian bank scam, positivity as a general rule, works better than whining. Sob stories don’t sell.

Sob stories at networking events make people inch away. Sob stories on Twitter cause people to unfollow you. Sob stories during a  job interview leave a bad impression on the hiring manager, who won’t call you back for that follow-up interview.

Think about it. If whenever people see you or read your tweets and you’re frustrated and discouraged because things aren’t going well, your pessimism is what they’ll remember. And who’s going to want to work down the hall from Mr. Pessimistic?

Don’t be a Debbie Downer. Do your very best to always convey positivity. Because people want to work with people they like. And most people don’t like a Debbie Downer.

I know it can be hard to sound optimistic when times are tough. But people are always watching you, gauging you, judging you.  And the way you respond to adversity is how you will be remembered. This is how people will perceive your brand. So if you’re having an especially tough day, refrain from posting online. Wait until you feel better!

How to Project Positivity and Get Your Point Across

1. Focus on all the good you have done. Create an online portfolio or  list of career wins. (Reflecting on all of these wins will uplift you on a particularly bad day). Tweet a positive link to your profile, or update your LinkedIn status with what you have done and what you can do, i.e. “I love helping organizations tell their stories to the media. Take a look at some of my success stories. http://bit.ly/m4Rs84“
2. Lead with how you can help. Not what you want. Instead of saying “I’m looking for clients!” or “I’m looking for a new job. Help!” say “I’m a proven marketing professional who has helped large and small businesses double sales  through my outreach,” or “I’m a senior level fundraiser who helps struggling nonprofits land major funding through my powerful grant writing. How can I help you?”
3. Don’t miss opportunities Be sure to let people know where they can find more information about you. When you’re sending out emails, include your new portfolio and LinkedIn profile in your e-mail signature. Mention your website in your voicemail.
4. Be genuinely interested in people. Find out what other people are up to, what they need and how you can help them out. When you help others, they will naturally want to help you. The road to a great career is paved with mutually beneficial relationships. Don’t be the person who always has their  hand out asking for something. Ask how you can help. Can you volunteer your time? Before you ask someone to help you, be prepared to give something back.

How do you respond to negativity? Have you had a person turn you off with their pessimism online or in person?

Amanda Miller Littlejohn is a PR strategist at Mopwater Social PR, and the author of the Mopwater Manual, a career guide for PR professionals. Follow her on Twitter @amandamogul.

I have a joke in my house. Were you networking or “notworking”? Basically, when you were out last night at that reception, were you gathering contact information with no plan of action for putting it into use later on? Having a plan of action for the day after a networking event is crucial. Once you gather a stack of business cards, or enter those names and numbers into your Blackberry, you must find a way to efficiently and systematically keep in contact with your new contact.

It could be as simple as connecting on social networking sites so that you are both ambiently aware of each others comings and goings; it could be as sophisticated as entering your new contacts into a database after which they would receive periodic updates from you or your company about new promotions, publications,etc.

I reached out to Brian Sarff, a marketing consultant out of Kansas City, Missouri who writes the Marketing Bull Blog. He shared a few tips about how to close the circle of networking and make networking work after the in-person part is over. Here are some of his insights:

Gaining permission from a prospective client is the best and only way to effectively build  relationships [after meeting in person].  There have been a number of books on this subject, but they all boil down to the same basic principles.

Get Permission:  Having permission from the prospective client is imperative.  So after the initial meeting, send them a kind note of thanks and mention that you have a blog, weekly email, monthly newsletter, whatever it is that you have, and subscribe them to the service.  The first step in the service is to ask them to opt-in to your email campaign.  Then you are free to begin building the relationship.

Tailor the Message:  Now what to send to your prospective client?  That’s a good question and one that is easily answered, but not all at once.  Through an online email service like Constant Contact, iContact or myEmma, you can build in surveys to go out after the 5th or 10th or whichever email makes sense in your process.  Just ask questions that can be easily answered and will provide you more insight into the mind of your prospective client.  Once you have this information about the prospective client, then you can mold your periodic email to address the topics that are of most interest.  Now, should you have a prospect that you really want as a client,  look for things that only they are interested in, “clip” them from the internet using Snagit, and send them a direct email with a note.  “Hey Tyrone, I ran across this on the internet and thought you would really enjoy reading it.  Sue.”

Be Consistent:  This is the one step that is usually violated. Consistency or Discipline.  If you are going to publish every Thursday or on the third Wednesday each month, then make sure you never miss a date. If you promise content on specific subjects- make sure you deliver. Consistent messages, emailed over a period of time, addressing items of interest to your clients, will pull them closer to you.  They may not be ready to purchase  the day after they meet you, but by staying in contact, and by calling or emailing on a regular basis (every 90 days or so)  then over time you will become their go to for information.  And one day, when the need arises, they will hopefully ask you for your product or service and not your competitor.

Bryan Sarff is an infopreneur, entrepreneur, ghost writer, and business owner.  He has worked as a consultant in the financial services industry for several years and coaches financial advisors how to consistently attract more clients.

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I recently received a query from a Mopwater PR + Media Notes reader. A regular networking reception attendee, this reader wanted to know how people were handling that awkward space between just meeting someone in person and trying to get to know them on-line. Particularly when the in-meeting was professional in nature, it’s tough to always know how to follow up, how much to follow up and when following up is considered pestering.

After meeting promising leads in person, this reader says she immediately sets up Google alerts for her new contact’s clients and/or projects so she can send a note that says, “Hey I saw this and it was great” or “Thought this may interest you.” But what else are people doing?

I went to the experts to find out.

Reno Lovison, author of Turn Your Business Card Into Business told me that he sees networking as more art than science.

“It’s difficult to come up with a one size fits all follow-up approach,” he writes. “It begins at the point of contact. I try to learn something unique about the person I meet so that I am seeing that person as an individual not just another face with a business card. In my email follow up I try to share (as best as possible) some information that is pertinent to that person. This helps us both to remember what was meaningful about our encounter.”

Lovison says that lately when appropriate, he’s started blogging some information about his new contacts as as a way to better connect him or her with his network. This gives him a chance to follow up with an email that drives new contacts to his site and also demonstrates that Lovison is really interested in referring business to them.

” In some cases this becomes the beginning of an ongoing dialogue… It is time consuming but the idea is to be personal and sincere and not treat people as a generic commodity.”

Elaine Masters is a yoga instructor who regularly attends health expos where she captures e-mail addresses in order to inform people if they’ve won a prize through her raffle. She follows up with her newsletter Drivetime Yoga Notes, which offers tips on taking the stress out of driving.

“I follow up once or twice a month with another that has special offers on my book and cd, plus one or two very brief items on staying stress free or other interesting notes related to life behind the wheel,” Masters says. “What do I get out of it? A few sales, great testimonials, forwarding to friends, list-building that’s going to be leveraged into affiliate programs and joint ventures. It’s not always the immediate ROI but I’m servicing the clients and it does surprise me once in awhile with offers to present or better. The business is small but growing.” Continue Reading